Conversations about conversations about conversations from a bar

I am sitting in the bath tonight, sipping wine, watching the water vapors drift like disembodied ghosts from the hot water below to the cold air above and trying to figure out the direction in which this blog, or this writing project, or this life is going.  How do I best document my life and the people and events within?

What am I good at, asshole (I was taught to never end a sentence with a preposition, hence the 'asshole')?  Eating.  Drinking.  Lecturing (that one is from Lael).  Talking.  How to combine all that into a project or a direction to go?

Document.  I have a knack of remembering conversations, but not necessarily details of conversations.  I remember events, but not necessarily exact details of events.  I need help.  So, why not enlist the help of some sort of recording device.  A digital recorder to record the conversations we have.  Some are great and inspiring.  Some are insightful.  Some are mundane.  Some are pure genius.  How do I navigate between the conversations about religion and politics, sports, health and life and those about whether SpongeBob has square pants or if he is the one that is square, making any clothing he uses appear square?  How do I differentiate between the discussions of the vastness of time and space and the lunacy of the vastness of the garbage can that houses Oscar the Grouch?

Another option:  High definition mini camera attached to my head.  Then, after careful filtering, I could broadcast all those fabulous conversations and events that surround us and involve us.  Not only would I love being able to capture all the spontaneity that is life, but I am sure the general public would pay handsomely to see recorded instances of me brushing my teeth and watching television.

I could always attach the camera to my crotch, therefore giving the world a view from a different perspective.  I do believe, though, that no one, including myself, wants to see just what life is like to a real dick and couple of nuts.

So, what's next?  The creation of "Conversations from a Bar."  I have the best inspiration and conversation while sitting in a bar with others.  Hell, I have spent a decent percentage of my life in bars, whether I was drinking or eating or working or sleeping (only happened a few times back in the day).  All I need to do now is work on capturing the essence of the conversation, documenting and then getting enough people to be interested in my view of the world as seen through the conversations in a bar to make me fabulously wealthy.

Should only take a few days, eh.
Bring it.

A truly selfish act

It is my opinion, and you may criticize me as you will, that there is no such thing as a truly selfless act.  After all, we are essentially primal beings that are not capable of seeing anything based upon anything beyond how it affects us personally.


I have said it before, and I will say it again.  If you are honest, then you cannot disagree.


Case in point, a friend of mine has a new boy friend.  Great.  Couldn't be happier.  One thing; he doesn't like things.  Wine.  Good food.  Art.  Culture.  You know, good things, at least as far as this friend thinks.  She wants to change him.  Introduce him to new things.  Convince him that these things are good.


Do you really think she is doing this for selfless reasons?  She wants to improve his life simply for his sake?  No.  I guarantee she does these things simply to be able to enjoy these very things with her new bo.  Selfless.


Secondly, a representative government and the benefit of all the people of a country are two things that can't actually exist.  A representative is human.  She has ambitions.  She thinks she is right.  She wants a career.  She wants to be heard. She wants money.  She wants to be re-elected.  Do you really think she listens to everybody she represents?  I can't blame her for any aspect of this life.  I want the same things.


Democracy depends on a level playing field.  One does not exist.  The rich and the powerful have the louder voices.  They have the collective voices that can only be grouped with wealth.  Do you think the representative listens to the poor fish monger in the same way as she listens to the CEO who can add money to the coffers and help fulfill ambition?  Of course not.  It's not wrong.  It's honest and it's real.


I don't care about what kind of disastrous day you are having.  Of course I am sympathetic, but if it doesn't affect me, who cares?  Sorry.  Love ya.
g 

Technology in the time of terror

We are approaching the end of a decade.
For what will the 00 decade be remembered?
The 70's?  Disco?  Vietnam?  Three's Company?
The 80's?  Regan?  Wall Street?  Berlin Wall?  Space Shuttle?
90's?  Aids?  Grunge?  Lewinsky?

How about the 00's?

This has been the decade of terror and of conflict.  Partisanship, fear and hatred.  Really high highs and really low lows.  With all this said, I just want to send out a note about technology and all the things that have been made obsolete in the decade that will soon be over.  I may even put forth a prediction or two.

US mail
Dial up internet
Good music
Land line telephones
CRT TV's
CDs
VCRs
Well written TV shows
Original movie ideas
Fax machines
Answering machines
Newspapers
Film cameras
Hand written letters
Patience

All that said, I want to offer a few predictions about the next decade or two and about elements of life that may not completely disappear, but will easily become insignificant:  Email will be be made obsolete.  With social networking and texting, it will just be too slow and old fashion.  Movies will be gone or changed forever.  Video games will own the next 20 years as you will be able to insert yourself into the plot of any movie scenario.  Laptop computers?  Gone.  PDA phones and the like will force these things into the history museums.  Radio stations are on the way out.  These are still the love to the older generation.  Digital music availability will bury them even further into obscurity.  Malls.  Why go when you can click?  Wires...for everything.  Printed books.  And more.

Feel free to add your thoughts...as long as they are original.

Subtle Escapism

All good stories are filled with pain and pleasure.  Bitter and sweet.  Suffering and contentment.  Philosophically, you can't have one without the other.

The thing about fantasy, or idealism, is that people are drawn to it because there is something inherently missing or dysfunctional in their lives.  Why read, or watch TV, or go to movies if all is well with the world or with our lives?

I have always thought of myself as the type of person that was happy with life.  Good work.  great love.  Passion.  Happiness.  Everything.  As I sit here watching one of the Star Wars movies, on the right side of the bed, I can't help but wonder; why is it that I am drawn to the idealism of fantasy? Wisdom?  Good over evil?  What?  It could be that I want to escape from something in the mundane.  Could be that I want to pursue a different or better existence in a more idealistic environment.  I guess it could be as simple as the fact that Star Wars came out when I was 6 or so and that we are impressionable at that age.  And, I really liked the droids back then.

Who knows?

Yin and Yang of the Holidays

Ever since I was a boy I was fascinated with human behavior.  And, in my adult life, I have worked in some fascinating businesses and been a part of some very interesting experiences with regards to my interaction with humanity.    

I have worked in advertising, where client management is king.

I have worked in retail, where customer satisfaction is the goal.

I have worked in the service industry, where total human fulfillment is absolutely everything.

I guess, what I am saying is that, I have seen many facets of human behavior and have grown to be sure of one thing:  I have no idea why people do whatever it is they do.

Case in point:  The Holidays.

When dealing with the general public during the holiday season, I continue to be amazed at the shear number of people who are unbelievably kind, generous, loving and respectful.  This is balanced only (and completely) by the great masses of people who have obviously chosen to be incredible assholes.

Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a middle ground.

Merry Christmas.

The greediest generation Vol. 1

Tom Brokaw writes books and travels the world, pounding his chest and lecturing about what he perceives to be the Greatest Generation.  Those about whom he discusses are the ones born into war and born to fight wars.  Depression babies who fought in WWII then came home to build and rebuild the country. My grandparents were a few of these people. He makes several good points, although quite historically one sided.  

My conversation is, and will always be as it relates to these posts, about the generation that was born from that Greatest Generation.  I have labeled these people the Greediest Generation.  I plan to break down these thoughts as the days move along, but for now I will begin by making a gross generalization.  The baby boomers are the source of many of the greatest challenges we are to face over the next decades.

They were handed a country fresh off a WWII victory for which they didn't have to fight.  They were handed a period of incredible economic growth, of which they were not a direct part of building.  They were given family businesses and social safety nets such as Social Security and Medicare by the voting public made up of their parents and grandparents.

What did they do with these assets?  The started and fought unnecessary fights (Vietnam, Iraq, Grenada, Nicaragua, etc).  They took all the money out of the system, basically converting the US from the richest and greatest creditor nation in the world to the greatest debtor nation the world will ever know.  They have used our natural resources with the knowledge that they will not last forever, but without a thought of what future generations will have to do.  They went to college for peanuts, have sold off the family farms and family businesses and bankrupted the social safety nets they were handed but for which they never had to work, effectively insuring future generations will not be able to count on Social Security and Medicare as they are now and as they are enjoyed by this generation.

Again, generalizing, they have taken all the options that were theirs by their perceived birth-right and have succeeded at the cost of, and by limiting the options of, future generations. 

The generation before them worked hard and fought harder to make sure their kids had a better life.  The baby boomers have worked hard, in a world that was built and secured for them, to make sure they have everything they need with little to no respect for those who are to come.

This is the premise.  Over the days, I will try to refine and discuss.  Call it sour grapes if you will...Or jealousy...Or outright anger.  But it's not.  This is merely a profile and a series of observations from the only perspective I have.

Talk hard. 

Uncle G's Tips for Teens - Volume 1

Thus begins my series of honest advice to those that will listen...or read.  Volume one:  Pruning.

I hope you all know what happens when you prune a bush or a tree.  The dead, weak and unwanted areas are stripped away, thus making the remaining stronger.  Or, as the dictionary states: Trimming or removing what is superfluous.

I would like to take this practice and move it to all areas of life.  I really think we all could do some pruning.
Di-clutter.  Get rid of the crap in your house and keep only what has real value.  If you have read the book...lose it.  Still have that concert t-shirt from 1987?  Come on.
Eat less food but make it better and much better for you.
Do less, but do it better.
Drink less alcohol but drink only the best wine, beer and cocktails.  Wouldn't you much rather have a couple really good glasses of wine instead of 12 Coronas?

And, cut some of the dead weight friendships and acquaintances and concentrate on making the good friends you have better, lifelong friends.  You know about whom I speak.  Everyone has that guy.  You know, the guy from the place that time oh so long ago.  You speak every few months...when you forget to screen his call.  He does all the talking about his life, never asking about you.  Uh huh.  Yeah.  That's cool.  Totally.  If the time you waste on those types of relationships was spent with others for whom you care more, wouldn't that be time better spent?

Sound heartless?  Tough love.  Get used to it.  This is what we all need to do.  Our lives of quantity over quality have created way too many fast food chains, three way calling over bluetooth, invitations to weddings you have no intention of attending but for which  you still have to buy a meaningless gift and, of course, the possibility of getting that "hey, I need you to bail me out of jail" 3am phone call from a guy who is simply a guy you knew from that place that time oh so long ago.

Living an iTunes life

If only organizing all elements of life were as simple (and as refreshing) as organizing my iTunes library.  Now, it is getting more difficult to categorize as I have accumulated around 8000 songs, but I can still fly through and make some play lists and decide what I want to listen to without much effort.

What would be on your play list of life?  How would you start it every day?  How often would you add or delete selections?  Wouldn't Pink Floyd fit just right in there?

Mood is everything.

Nobel-ly conflicted

Every day, each of us has countless opportunities to make the right decisions.  Keeping this in mind, i am continually amazed with the sheer volume of poor decisions made by countless people, daily.

More on this later.

This is one of those days.  You know, "one of those days."  For me, one of those days is simply about being conflicted.  Is it cereal or peanut butter?  Toast or a bagel?  Carry out or eat in?  Shower or bath?  You get the point.  But this day brought an emotional conflict that reached a level beyond what I usually hit.  This was a philosophical and emotional conflict.

President Obama stood up to receive his Nobel Peace Prize.  All politics aside, I am thrilled that an American President again has been awarded this prize.  That's four, I believe.  The conflict is with what he said.

I am paraphrasing when I tell you that he said that war was a necessary part of the human condition and that  America is a beacon for good and the fighter for the oppressed and the security for those who don't have security. Hell, America probably finds lost kittens, too.  Great.  This is all true.  I don't want to talk about the issues of war being a business model or about the Military Industrial Complex as designated by President Eisenhower or even the 1.2 trillion dollars the Pentagon has lost (actually misplaced...seriously) over the last few years.  Those topics will be discussed at a later day and over many cocktails.

My issue is this; They say we are human so we fight.  We engage in wars because it is part of being alive.  For greed.  Fear.  Ambition.  Destiny.  You name it.  I am sure we are all evil war mongering people.

And, as long as we continue to think that way, it will never change.

I guess I just want everybody, just for a minute, to think that is isn't okay to be a war mongering people.  Just for a second.  If we could do that, maybe there would be peace.  The President is right.  But it doesn't have to be that way.  Like I said...conflicted.

Legacy Volume 1

This is going to be a long one.  Not all on this day, but over the next year or so we will be discussing similar issues related in some way to the term "legacy."

Out for a quick run/walk this afternoon, we passed a grade school just as it was letting out for the day.  Funny, but all I could notice was the line of about 50 cars, many of them parked in the street, many with parents reading in them, all with engines running, waiting for the child for whom they are responsible to emerge from the school, run toward them and get in for the quick block and a half ride home.  Happy day.  Time to go home.

I am not what others would call an environmentalist.  I am a rationalist.  This isn't about carbon.  This isn't about oil.  This isn't about waste.  This is about thought.  No matter what the talking heads say, we are a cause of environmental change.  We only have a set amount of natural resources from which to draw to power our vehicles and homes and business and espresso machines.  The question is:  What is the legacy we are leaving for future generations?  

As we waste our natural resources keeping the car running to keep it warm while still having the window down, do we think about the availability of these resources for the child we are picking up?  My guess is that we do not.

Being emotionally balanced makes me remember that we are a primal species, no matter what we think.  So, it really doesn't make sense for us to be totally selfless.  That is not reasonable.  However, can we agree that it might just be better for all concerned if you just turn off the cars for the 10 minutes it will take to get your kid out of the school?  Maybe then, your kid will have the luxury of having a car to drive to pick up his or her kid when they get out of school 25 years from now.

Maybe, if that seems unreasonable, why don't I just ask this:  Can we just turn off the cars for the 10 minutes it will take to get your kid out of the school?  Maybe then I won't have to run by 75 cars and suck in 75 cars worth of exhaust while I am passing by.

As I said, we may talk about the legacy of what we leave to our children, but it is always, at its core, simply about me.

Just a little politics, I guess...

Not really politics, I guess, but politically topical conversations.

I guess my only real problem with the whole health care debate is that no one really gets to the meat of the issue with regards to private health insurance companies.

Throughout this debate on the American health care system, I think it is important to remember that health insurance companies haven't given one flu shot.  They haven't performed one test.  They haven't provided any medical advice.  They haven't written one prescription.  They haven't performed one surgical procedure.

All they do is indirectly move money from a patient to a provider.  They are a bank, of sorts.  And they charge anywhere from 30 to 50 percent to do it.  They take money from you, hold on to it for a while and then try their very best to not have to pay it out.  Oh, and even if they do pay it out, they keep 30%.  Wow.  That's good business. They have no real risk as they don't provide any products.  Sure, there could be a run of really sick people that could max out their revenue, but they would just up their revenue and then send in the lawyers to do everything they could to not pay for the bills accrued by the patients.  There are stories about this all over.  They keep stalling in courts long enough to bury the patient with legal fees because it is cheaper for them than paying the claims.

Imagine another way.  Visa, you know, the credit card processing company, charges somewhere around 3% to provide its customers with the ability to go into a store, choose something to buy and then swipe a little piece of plastic through a little machine hooked up to a phone line.  Shazam, your bank account is debited and all is well.  Imagine if Visa charged 30%.  There would be no customers and all would go back to cash.  But wait, they even provide the technology to make this happen, not to mention ID security and fraud protection and cute little cards.  Health insurance companies have not innovated.  They don’t make it easier to get access to a doctor.  In fact, they limit to whom you can go see.

They scare us into believing that we need them because something catastrophic may happen.  And it works.  I’m terrified.  And, I am insured.

Some of the older generations about this with whom I have argued keep saying that I don’t get it.  They are on Medicare, by the way.  Medicare charges 6% to move money from you to your doctor.  Hmm.

I guess I just don’t get it.

More on this later.

Indecision is paralyzing

When I can't decide what to do, unfortunately I more often than not end up doing nothing.

There art two cardinal sins from which all others spring: Impatience and Laziness.
- Franz Kafka

A pirate looks at forty.

We would close the bar at 2am on Saturdays.  LT would clean the bar, I would count the money and the Cue Ball would already be down in the pool hall, having been relieved of his work several hours ago, stealing beers and cigars and preparing for our weekly 9-ball extravaganza.

I was always the last one to hit the tables having to lock up and make sure all was okay.  Our hand-crafted steel blue 9-foot slate pocket billiards tables would all be covered in darkness except for the one closest to the door, closest to the bar and closest to the juke box.  That was always the one Cue Ball chose.  He was the best player of the three of us but he was always a bit loaded by the time we got to playing so as to even the odds dramatically.

The funny thing is, the first song LT always played on that old neon pink and purple juke box was 'A Pirate Looks at Forty' by Jimmy Buffet.  We would play until 5 or 6am.  We would lose hundreds of dollars to each other and win hundreds of dollars from each other.  Beers.  Steely Dan.  Bourbon.  Van Morrison.  Cigars.  The sun always came up.  The cleaning crew and prep cooks showed up to prep the place for Sunday and we would leave.  Time to sleep.

Now, every time I hear that song, the first thought is of those pool games in the middle of the night at the bar.  We all worked hard there.  Overtime every day, every week.  But, when we were done we always wanted to stay and play.  Just a little longer.

I made enough money to buy Miami but I pissed it away too fast.

That was over a decade ago.  Now I look at forty.  It all seems so long ago.

The cannons don't thunder, there's nothing to plunder.

Time passes.

Notes from the right side of the bed

At least that's what I am calling it.  This is my challenge to myself on my 40th birthday.  My white whale.  Please don't call me Ishmael.

This being the 40th anniversary of my birth (thanks again, Mom), I have been doing a little reflecting.  It is natural to think about the past and the future when hitting such a milestone.  Another decade done.  This gets me thinking of change.  Challenges.  Opportunities.  Cupcakes.

At 10, the age of 40 didn't even exist to me.  My neighbor who was in college at the time seemed as old as the majestic oak trees that lined our street.  At 20, I didn't think about making it to 40 because I was sure I wouldn't live that long. Not to mention that I didn't think of much beyond cocktails and chicks.  At 30, 40 still seemed so far away and didn't seem to be much of a concern.  Life was still young.  I was just getting going.  Moving, shaking and making the most out of what I had.  Now, as I turn 40, I just sit for a day and wonder about what will come next as I look back on what is and what was.

In the year that comes, I will be documenting much of what I have seen, what I see and what I want to see in the world.  365 days until I turn 41.  365 days to write in this blog as I sit on the right side of my bed.  If I can do this, there just may be hope for me in the next 40.  Perhaps, the first 40 is necessary to give one focus on the rest.

That's my story as it stands today.  We'll see what it is tomorrow.